It is Day 5 of training for the 5k. I looked up the date of the annual "Race for the Cure" 5K that takes place in Cleveland every fall and this year it will be on September 11th. I am starting to panic....I was counting on a date in October.
Today I ran 1.6 miles without stopping. I am halfway there. Of course I was on the treadmill. All of my other runs have been outside. In addition to running I have also started some basic weight lifting. Today's run was by far the easiest. I wasn't winded but my body definitely hurts. I am not used to this. I know I haven't run at all since High School. Sad.
I keep waiting for the "runner's high" everyone talks about. So far I have nothin'. In fact I hate every second. That is my relationship with exercise. I hate it. I know it is good for me and I am glad when I do it (afterwords), but during it....I am counting down the seconds until I can be done. To me exercise is just another chore on my to do list....like cleaning the bathroom or doing the laundry. Except experts say you should do it every day. That is the part that sucks. When you clean the bathroom once you are in good for a while (I use the term "a while" because I don't really want the world to know how long my bathroom goes between cleanings...). But with exercise you could run 5 miles in one day and be expected to do the same thing if not MORE the next. Ugh.
Oh well....I do feel better knowing I am doing something positive for myself. And I have already lost a few pounds.
Today as I was running on the treadmill I couldn't help watching the calorie counter. As I reached the end of my run it said I had burned 185 calories. That's it??? 185 lousy calories. Jesus Christ. That is the amount in one of those small granola bars or one yogurt. That blows. That is probably the equivalent of one oreo or one god damn spoonful of ice cream. I see how people can get discouraged. I can also hear all those fitness freaks telling me to substitute non-fat sorbet for my favorite blizzard at the DQ or some weird turkey burger for my favorite meal at 5 Guys. No thanks. It's just not the same. Oh well....I will keep chugging along.
On a side note as I was running Ian came downstairs to inform me that was Dinosaur Train was over. (Thanks Buddy - I needed to know that). When he saw me on the treadmill he asked, "What you doin' Mommy?" I told him I was exercising. He told me to stop so I could play a game with him and that I was "all wet" and needed to go dry off. He's right...on both fronts. Time to go play another rousing game of Candy Land.
Thursday, July 29, 2010
Monday, July 26, 2010
Wisconsin was not kind to my body. Too much cheese and sausage led to me putting on 4 pounds in one week. Drinking every night with my parents also might have had something to do with it. I also have several bug bites on my legs that continue to itch. I am starting to think that all bug sprays are a scam. I loaded that stuff on me every night and still got bit. ??
Anyway I weighed myself on Saturday night when we got back into town right before going to bed. I almost cried when I saw the number. How could this be? I am not pregnant and really can't use "I just had a baby" as my excuse anymore. After all she is 1 now. I started to think back as to what I weighed before having my kids and when I got married. When I was really honest with myself I realized I need to lose 15 pounds to get back down to the weight I was before I had my kids. 15 pounds. Sounds easy....but I think I might have to actually exercise to get that off.
Lately I keep see posts from friends of mine on Facebook who have achieved fitness goals...like running a 5K or completing a triathlon. When I see their pictures and read about their successes the bigger part of me is thinking, "Wow that is awesome. I am jealous! I wish I could do that. " The other petty part of me is thinking, "You suck. Now there is one more person who looks amazing after motherhood to make me feel worse about my own body."
Even though I know it is wrong to let the petty part of me have a voice, I actually think this is the voice that is going to inspire me. I used to like the way I looked. I used to think I looked pretty good. I miss my old, pre-motherhood body. I miss my flat stomach and cute butt. I miss easily fitting into my size 8's and being able to eat whatever I want. Now I have to squeeze into those size 8's and every time I eat I think, "Will I regret this later?".
So after weighing myself I came into bed and told Chad. He of course in his ever so supportive tone said, "Well, what are you going to do about it?" After 10 minutes of a back and forth sarcastic battle between the two of us in which I got defensive, then pouty, I realized he was right. (God it sucks to write that....). Somehow during the course of this conversation Chad became my trainer. I am not sure how this happened. I know I didn't ask him, but I also know deep down that I need someone to push me. Someone who won't take any of my excuses or bullshit and someone who is good at being a douche to me....who better than my husband?
Seriously though...he is perfect for the job. So last night training officially began. I should also add that I want to run in a 5k this fall to support those fighting breast cancer. My friend was recently diagnosed and is working her ass off to battle this disease. Her kids are the same ages as mine (3 and 1) and her diagnosis came as quite a shock. If she can endure chemo, surgery, and radiation then I can run a 5k. My fat, hasn't run since high school ass can run a 5k. It's not that far right? 3.2 miles...what?
So last night I suited up (running shoes, ponytail, knee-brace) and started off on the course Chad set for me. Let's just say it sucked. But I did it. I couldn't run all the way - but I ran more than I thought I could. And after I caught my breath and sucked down a bottle of water, I felt good! There is more in store for me tonight....so stay tuned. I will need all of my friends to keep me inspired to get back into shape and lose those last 15 stubborn pounds. But more importantly I want to be able to say I did something. I set a goal and completed it. I know that will be the best reward.
Anyway I weighed myself on Saturday night when we got back into town right before going to bed. I almost cried when I saw the number. How could this be? I am not pregnant and really can't use "I just had a baby" as my excuse anymore. After all she is 1 now. I started to think back as to what I weighed before having my kids and when I got married. When I was really honest with myself I realized I need to lose 15 pounds to get back down to the weight I was before I had my kids. 15 pounds. Sounds easy....but I think I might have to actually exercise to get that off.
Lately I keep see posts from friends of mine on Facebook who have achieved fitness goals...like running a 5K or completing a triathlon. When I see their pictures and read about their successes the bigger part of me is thinking, "Wow that is awesome. I am jealous! I wish I could do that. " The other petty part of me is thinking, "You suck. Now there is one more person who looks amazing after motherhood to make me feel worse about my own body."
Even though I know it is wrong to let the petty part of me have a voice, I actually think this is the voice that is going to inspire me. I used to like the way I looked. I used to think I looked pretty good. I miss my old, pre-motherhood body. I miss my flat stomach and cute butt. I miss easily fitting into my size 8's and being able to eat whatever I want. Now I have to squeeze into those size 8's and every time I eat I think, "Will I regret this later?".
So after weighing myself I came into bed and told Chad. He of course in his ever so supportive tone said, "Well, what are you going to do about it?" After 10 minutes of a back and forth sarcastic battle between the two of us in which I got defensive, then pouty, I realized he was right. (God it sucks to write that....). Somehow during the course of this conversation Chad became my trainer. I am not sure how this happened. I know I didn't ask him, but I also know deep down that I need someone to push me. Someone who won't take any of my excuses or bullshit and someone who is good at being a douche to me....who better than my husband?
Seriously though...he is perfect for the job. So last night training officially began. I should also add that I want to run in a 5k this fall to support those fighting breast cancer. My friend was recently diagnosed and is working her ass off to battle this disease. Her kids are the same ages as mine (3 and 1) and her diagnosis came as quite a shock. If she can endure chemo, surgery, and radiation then I can run a 5k. My fat, hasn't run since high school ass can run a 5k. It's not that far right? 3.2 miles...what?
So last night I suited up (running shoes, ponytail, knee-brace) and started off on the course Chad set for me. Let's just say it sucked. But I did it. I couldn't run all the way - but I ran more than I thought I could. And after I caught my breath and sucked down a bottle of water, I felt good! There is more in store for me tonight....so stay tuned. I will need all of my friends to keep me inspired to get back into shape and lose those last 15 stubborn pounds. But more importantly I want to be able to say I did something. I set a goal and completed it. I know that will be the best reward.
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